So I've never pretended to not be attracted to men. For example, when I was watching the marathon of America's Next Top Model, I won't deny imagining what sex with Nigel Barker would be like (how can you go wrong with a half Indian, half British mix?...mmm). But last night, I hung out with friends at a few bars, and I was watching all these girls pining over attention from attractive and not-so attractive males. And I just didn't get it. I'm definitely in gay mode right now because all I kept thinking was, "Why are there so many straight people?" I just felt this huge, sudden disconnect with heterosexuals and the heterosexual side to me.
I don't know. Everything about males strikes me as so easy, and this element has become somewhat of a turn off for me. Testosterone has ensured the fact that male attention will always be easy for females to get. And the male genitalia isn't exactly complicated to figure out. I know I'm being very stereotypical right now, but men can feel like different species at times. And, in this moment, I don't quite get why a woman would want to try to connect with another species. I'm well aware that men are capable of being more than just testero-creatures. I have had strong, deep connections with two men in my life, and I still feel this gap between myself and the heterosexual paradigm.
And suddenly, yesterday, I missed my ex-boyfriend and thought that maybe I made a mistake when I refused to stay friends with him after breaking up with him. I thought maybe we should try to slowly forge a close friendship now that we disposed of the sexual tension. I felt like I could deal with the fact that he quickly replaced me with another intelligent woman who is a better match for him than I was.
Hmmmm...
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9 comments:
I still being here...Although sometimes I fell absolutely lost.
Language things.... Sometimes I hate my dictionary!!!!
Besos,
Eva
I'm going to try to translate what I'm saying:
Yo soy tratando a decir que me gusta los hombres solo para cosas sexuales. Pero los hombres son facil, y no me gusta eso.
Y no me gusta como parece que TODAS las personas son heterosexual.
Tambien, no entiendo porque mujeres quiere hombres. Hombres puede ser muy differente de mujeres.
Thanks a lot. You're very kind.
In addition, I can not be shut up, you speak Spanish vary well .
Ok, I understand.
I'm not sure that thus it is expressed, but I am afraid that also there are easy-women too.
It is certain that between the men they are multitude, but I think that it is rather a quality of the person more than of its sex.
In any case, I do not like the simple thing either because at heart it is vulgar, common, little magical, without attractive.
I know that it's thus, but we would have to be worried reason why they are the other that what more they seem (even of we ourself).
And, yes, I don't know either so that is to discriminate nothing...Here, people say that in the variety it is the taste, and I create it fervent.
Oh, my god,that's incredible!!! how much I have written. I only hope not to have committed too many errors.
A warm hug, dear Shane, and a pleasure to read your ideas, although sometimes I am a clumsy one.
Besos,
Eva
And I continue hating my dictionary...
Besos
Eva,
I learned Spanish for six years, so I have some abiliy to to at least write it. I've made no efforts to practice it for four years though. Maybe one day I'll actually take the time to really learn it.
Puedes escribir en ingles bien!
Es la verdad. Mujeres tambien puede ser facil. Yo debo mirar a una persona a tiempo.
Thanks for pointing this out to me.
Besos y Abrazos,
S
I can't believe I'm so behind on reading your blog. I guess I've been busier than I thought. I do miss these insightful posts though. I'm glad I'm able to catchup tonight.
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