Mission Impossible

One: In the past month or so, I've now had two straight female friends volunteer to pretend to be gay for me:

Friend: You should take me as your hot lesbian date.
Me: You're not very convincing...
Friend: Hey! I can butch it up!

I love how she was offended. I'm not sure what to make of this generosity.

Two: I was thinking about the two ex's whom I despise. They have a few things in common: 1) a need to constantly sell oneself through elitism 2) and an arrogant view of pussy. Those who assume that they fully understand all that there is to understand about vagina will never master it.

Confidence is important, but so is humility. I suddenly feel like pussy is the Tao: The more you know, the less you understand.