Uh oh.

1. Boy and I have been practicing cohabitation during this past week. It has been going well so far. I find myself enjoying doing domestic things with/for him: the dishes, cooking, taking out the trash. When the hell did this happen?

2. I am somewhat pleased to report that the sporty spice part of me is coming back in bits. I don't foresee myself being a gym whore with workout goals anytime soon. But it's certainly nice to whip a little ass on the basketball court and glide a frisbee around.

3. I am gaining weight. My love for dark chocolate is helping. I know that this is good; even I was starting to feel like I looked too much like someone from a third world country. I am eating more on purpose. But this doesn't mean that I'm doing what I really want to do. I'm just doing the right thing, because, well it's the right thing. I do not want the right thing.

I am coming to accept that I will always be playing a bit of a game with myself that bounces between scratching an old itch and being "normal." Luckily I am not putting my health at risk.

4. I am finding, more and more, that finding a female visually pleasing does not necessarily mean that I have any desire to touch her.

5. I wish I wasn't such a bitchy hypocrite about pudginess. A tiny bit of girl pudge is cute and tactile; a bit too much of girl pudge turns my head away. It's worse that I don't judge males as harshly. I feel like such a bot.