Up until I heard the podcast in which Kelka had a heated debate over bisexuality (411: Literary License to Kill), I was unaware of the double standard that bisexuals in straight relationships would simply identify as straight, but bisexuals in gay relationships would identify as bisexual.
I was confused as to why that would be. The last time I was in a relationship with a male, I was very vocal about the fact that I play for both teams; he called me a "free agent." But I guess there is a "safety" in being bi: you can still be a part of the massive hetero world where your sexuality isn't judged. It reminds me of the idea of light-skinned black people passing off as white to avoid discrimination.
Remember when it seemed like everyone (gay, straight, bi, male, female) was obsessed with Angelina Jolie? She was like the acceptable straight girl crush for a while. I have no idea how popular she is now, but I certainly liked her for a while (now I think she's sort of fake, anorexic, and odd-looking, but that's another topic). Now she's with Brad, and I don't blame her for wanting to settle down with a man that beautiful (part of the reason why I watched Fight Club so many times was to stupidly stare at him).
But Angelina was somewhat of a bisexual icon who was very vocal and sincere about her diverse tastes, and this (slightly bitter) article talks about how she's done with the diversity now that she's with Brad. So was it all fun and games? Would she have ever considered settling down with a woman? I must admit I feel annoyed, but if you're committed to one person, then there's only so much you can do--literally (not really funny).
I think if you're bisexual, you have two sexualities: actual and current. Currently, Angelina is straight, and it looks like she'll stay that way assuming she stays monogamous. I guess you can't avoid pissing someone off, especially if you're a free agent. If Brad is meeting all her needs, then more power to her.
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"I think if you're bisexual, you have two sexualities: actual and current. Currently, Angelina is straight, and it looks like she'll stay that way assuming she stays monogamous."
No, no, no. I can agree that a bi has two possibilities for who they will sleep with- men or women, this particular man or a woman, this particular woman or any man. Angelina isn't straight unless she says she is, and I am of the firm belief that we need to respect the sexuality people say they are- if a straight woman eats a little pussy but says she straight, then she is. Her sexual history may be "bi" but her mentality towards relationships and sex is straight. And ultimately, her sexual mentality is more important than her history. Likewise, bisexual women are bisexual, even if they are in male-female relationships.
After all, celibate people who haven't gotten laid in a year still have a sexuality. I don't think your sexuality is entirely about who you are fucking.
And having now read that ae.com article, I am really annoyed at the term "bi gone". Perhaps the real problem is that the number of men interested in women is much, much higher than women interested in women, meaning statistically, most women will end up with men. The article annoyed me on many levels, and the most annoying one is that they are basically demanding that married bisexuals discuss wanting to sleep with people other than their spouse. You won't find me arguing that people need only sleep with one person until death, but that strikes me as pretty tacky.
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