Monday, November 5, 2007

Let it Out

I'm proud of myself for some things that I did this weekend. I came out of a few different types of closets:
  • I finally came out to a friend I had been meaning to come out to for a while. I was waiting for the right time until I threw the notion of "the right time" out the window and just did it. Good friends will listen no matter what the timing is.
  • I had a rough time with a few challenging situations, and I (*gasp*) opened up to friends about it. I didn't just bottle it up and let it fester like I usually do. What a concept!
No, I didn't come out completely in the gay way. But I've noticed that I hide the parts of myself that I won't think certain people will want to put up with. I feel like a burden or that my issues don't merit attention. I invalidate my own problems and identity by keeping it in. And isn't that sort of what being in the closet is like?

I'm getting to a point where I just need to be more honest with people even though the consequences of this terrify me. But in the words of Bettina from Six Feet Under, "I think if you're afraid of something? It means you should probably do it."

2 comments:

Des said...

Coming out can hard but if you're going to do it, you have to do it for yourself. I was going to wait to come out to my family until I was in a serious relationship that way I had an excuse to come out but there shouldn't be any excuses. I came out to my family for my own benefit, so I could be honest with not only them but myself as well. It was so liberating. :) In the beginning its all about the baby steps.

ShaneMo said...

Thanks for the good advice!