Just Go With the Flow?

I was thinking about season 1 of "The L Word," and I had the urge to google "lesbian-identified male" when I remembered Lisa, the man who likes to have sex with women but still considers himself to be a lesbian. I was hoping for some answers, but most of my search results just had more questions posed in discussion forums. Go figure.

At first I thought it was kind of silly that he would consider himself a lesbian; just because he wants a woman to penetrate him doesn't mean he has to switch sexualities. He could just consider himself "kinky" instead of "lesbian." (Maybe one day in the future people will be able to introduce themselves as "kinky" just like they might introduce themselves as "gay" or "straight"). But he's sort of odd. He seems confortable in his body, so he's probably not trans. He's not the most masculine of men; he's kind of needy. Is that why he considers himself gay? Ick.

Blah, the whole thing is confusing. I mean, I'm all for identifying however you want, and yay for fluidity, but it's quite the mindfuck. I remember seeing Eddie Izzard (a hilarious transvestite comedian) describe himself as a butch lesbian who fancies girls. And yet his make up and attire are over-the-top and drag queen-like. It may not entirely make sense to me, but then again I don't always make sense to myself at times either.

Poor Lisa though. Although I completely related to Alice's desire to have completely uncomplicated sex with men, she was pretty mean to him, and she gave him the shaft that he didn't want.

I was also thinking about Keith on "Six Feet Under." He's a gay man in a committed relationship. He doesn't seem to identify as bisexual, but he admitted to enjoying having sex with women ( I believe his exact words were, "I looved fuckin' women"). I have an acquaintence like this: he ended up unintentionally leading my friend on and causing her a lot of heartbreak when he finally realized he was gay. These types of situations make Shane's proverb of "going with the flow" much easier said than done.

I forgot what my point was. Uh, I guess it's that grey has a lot of shades. Perhaps too many. And if I'm sitting here analyzing this and being open-minded (and still feeling a bit confused), then I can't imagine how an ignorant het could process this. Or maybe it doesn't need to be processed; maybe it should just labled and filed under "It is what it is."