I feel like I have a wife. Not sexually. Or legally. But emotionally. We tell each other about the ordinary occurrences and victories of our daily lives. We have a "what's mine is yours" attitude towards money.
She's smaller than I am, and one would stereotypically expect me to wear the pants in this relationship. But oohhh no! She bosses me around. She made me take a mini vacation to our state parks. She scolds me when I say something too crass or sexual.
And one time, when I didn't say "bye" in a vocally affectionate manner, she yelled at me and told our friends about it.
And when she feels insecure about how she looks in a certain dress, I make sure to tell her how good she looks.
She might sound like a bitch, but she's a sweet person. Furthermore, I like being treated like the dopey husband. When I admitted this to her yesterday, she let out an evil cackle and exclaimed, "I know! You're my toy!"
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